Balance of Past, Present, and Future
by Shiela Reed
Welcome to 2020! A new year and new decade!
What an amazing time to be alive! There is so much going on and I find myself embracing this life as I know it now. This is quite a bit different than how I have known things. It’s nice to actually finally feel that things are coming together.
I had been mostly aware and connected to my physical beingness as far as an outward expression, up to around 2010 and had always felt and had a very “separateness” to my inner self and awareness. I always knew it was there, and I actually always knew what it was saying, but I found myself often “ignoring it”. I kept choosing to be connected to one or the other at different points and finally realized I actually wasn’t “balanced” at all! Instead I needed to “blend” so it was one, the other, both, the same, and neither all at once.
My journey up to that point was a lot of reconciling the past, so as I went deeper into my inner soul journey and what I “thought” that needed to be, I found I really started to separate from my physical and didn’t exactly realize it. So over these years of inner work and “leaving out the physical” – I really just perpetuated a different version of the same duality. As that came more into my awareness the last couple of years I have found myself kind of naturally working on melding/blending/balancing them and naturally finding the inclusion of all my aspects. Physical, mental, emotional, spiritual/soul, energetic/etheric.
Interestingly enough, it is not until now, at this point in time, have I really felt such a cool “clearness” to this awareness and what it feels like to kind of be “together” in ONE.
So as I meditate and contemplate this season of my life and feel the awareness of my previous work and especially how the first half of this last decade began to pull together the acknowledgment that my past experiences were learning opportunities, was I able to start to be able to truly embrace and forgive myself for not “knowing everything”. I learned to allow healing of much of my “past”. And as the mid to later parts of the last decade began to show me how to begin looking at the importance of becoming more in-tune with my present self, I found myself naturally ending the last year of this decade also becoming more aware that my future self has something to contribute as well. I find a deep self healing resonance in this space as my true self shows me the creation of my own trinity of “full self”.
THIS has been the most recent work I have been doing and it is very humbling how this has shown itself to me and how the next decade of the journey for me is to be about further combining, melding, and balancing all three to feel true PEACE in my present moments.
So I feel compelled to share the message of this month, the first month of a new year and new decade- as it is time to feel balance in our past, present, and future.
As I draw from my own journey and works and the message that has come forward for this month and year, my hope is that there is something that resonates to move you one step closer to your own true purpose in your own journey.
While we all have different places we are at, there is a need for understanding and remembering that it’s all important, but just in different ways than our mind tries to understand it. I believe this is why it is difficult to write and share it sometimes.
We may know mentally that the “past is the past”, but we don’t understand why we cannot seem to “let go” of something in particular. This is the example of an energetic tie which is usually related to an element of our ego needs being met somehow. We either found safety, solace, acceptance, justification or any other number of “pay off’s” that we thought were meant to “make us feel better” or “support” us in some way.
For me, a very important turning point was being able to truly see that we do the best we can with what we have at the time and I feel that with true heartfelt compassion. While I’ve always said that and known it, I strangely realized, I had seemed to always do this much more freely with others than I could for myself. This is likely why I was drawn to being part of the helping field professions. Once I noticed this began to shift for me, it helped me see there was so much more to my “aliveness”.
I began to see the effects on my “nowness”. So this understanding that truly being PRESENT then expanded to include learning how to reconcile my own past within myself. We can see that occur for people when there is a deeper level of forgiveness that truly has “no strings attached” and it’s expression radiates with a feeling of unconditional love. When I started to feel that for myself, it was amazing the warmth and expansion I felt within.
The present became something that was “more” than it had been. It now included a healed part of me.
Today, there is a recognition that my newest understanding of “being present” also has inclusion of the future. Not as in controlling it and/or being afraid of it, which is what I found to be blocking my ability to truly to connect to it. But a similar kind of lovingness I learned to have by embracing my past. The ability gain the balance of having a connection to my future self is equally important and necessary for me to truly be PRESENT in my current moments.
As this has also been expanding for me, I feel the beginnings of a similar shift. A space of new awareness and growth. It shows me new information about myself and the world I’m a part of. This change and paradigm shift in our present world seems to be reflecting similarly in many others. It says “balance the past and future to create the truest form of the present”.
Clearly we each have our own role/part in this process. It does not mean the present becomes “perfect”. Every “part” still contributes to the “whole”. So they won’t be the same. So we will need to pay attention to being drawn to judgement, of self or others. We will learn to be “ok” with different because deep down we know WE are ok too.
I am truly hopeful that as this year unfolds and the exciting new things emerge- we can all begin to see how we can each choose our parts to contribute to that “newness” and begin to do that more and more together. By combining the cool differences to create something new. A new invention, a new theory, a new thought, a new way of life…. Even if we are different from one another.
So may your reflections on your past show you your life lessons and your true inner self show you how to be easy with yourself and others, as you learn to allow those lessons to unfold into new experiences in the present. And in these new experiences may we all be able to see the excitement of a new lesson and the opportunities it brings while not being fearful of our future. Thus we may fully embrace being a soul with a body in this world. And so it is…
Many blessings and hopes for a new year and decade full of building blocks that will be the solid base we each need for the bigger future.