by Shiela Reed
The regular theme for this month has been about Love – and the appearance of “different forms” – yet as we find the root of the intentions, the ones done with the “love” and of “trust – in divine right timing” with the collaboration of the two is what has been swirling around this month. I wrote this earlier in the month and had not posted it and find today that it seems to fit with the “theme”…. so it is shared with you out of heartfelt gratitude and love as the message of the month. I truly hope you have found your way through this month and find these words and the heart and love behind it, as the “cherry on top” for November….
I have and ALWAYS will believe in the power of “prayer”/good vibes/ love intended energy… whatever you want to call it… at the same time I am fully aware and also believe in “divine right timing”… so.. how does that fit together? Let me share a personal example….
Today (Nov 11 2018) my very elderly dog, Bosco, who has been with me through MUCH in life.. good and really not good… 16+ years worth at this point mind you… he is my “soulmate dog”.
Well, he woke up and had a new “issue”… his back right hip went out just while walking across the floor. To sum this up, here are his “issues”: separation anxiety most of his life (he is a rescue dog and has been with me since age 1 – our life together is yet another story ?)
heart failure (meds since age 12),
Chronic Dislocated back left knee
And today this…
I share this to also create a story for you… I full well know and realize he will not be with me forever. Which is true of anyone or anything, ourselves included. So, while we KNOW this, I myself continue to be amazed at how I can still get so “off center”, that I am not present for today’s joy’s in my current life and become so enveloped with fear. Yet, embracing and then releasing the pains of the future that tend to so easily trap me in fear and worry is not as easy as “a wish, or desire, or words”… even knowing “nothing here we try to hold, is forever”… it takes that regular and frequent checking within, re-centering, re-grounding, and “catching it” before it goes into a “loop”…
I was already in a loop from the previous week, which was already added on to by the previous week… and I “knew” I had some things to “tend to”, but I chose to “put it aside”, wait, do it differently, I really don’t know.. except my inner me told me to address it back then, and I didn’t. My ego/mind latched on to the “fears” and away we went with story after story of “what if’s”…
So flash forward to today and this event…
I was in tears, I feared the worst, even knowing “if it’s time, it’s time, there is nothing I can do about it”… I did my best to allow myself to feel the fear, say it out-loud, let it fly into the wind, and accept what was to be, without having to “know it” right now. Of course I found myself wanting to “control”.. but what this situation did do was force a shift on me that desperately needed to be released…so, as it started to “unfold”, I felt my heart reference point say “let go of the pain”… this one situation is NOT what this is all about….
I then knew from my heart that my intentions for asking friends and loved ones for “prayers/good vibes” was to request the energetic support for me and Bosco to go through WHATEVER was to be next…
That is exactly what I believe these “requests” are about. A true self asking other true selves for “support” in a time of need… even when asking for something specific, our inner selves already are connected to the Divine and knows what we need… the mind just wants to be involved… so, even though we “pray” for healing and may mentally have an opinion about what that looks like, deep within, when we truly trust and have faith… we know whatever comes, is simply meant to be. We just may not be able to see the type of “healing” that we actually “really” need.
So, as I let go, and allowed for whatever support came forward to come to me and Bosco… I was able to release the majority of the previous several weeks worth of “stuff” and be in a place I needed to be, so I could lovingly be present in this important moment for me, my current situation and my honored relationship with my sweet furry companion.
As we went to the vet, Bosco was calm, and I knew within it was all “ok”.. whatever that ended up looking like, didn’t matter as much anymore. I surrendered… today, the news was not catastrophic, there were options, possible solutions, and while that made my mind stay on the background, I felt in my heart, the whole event was needed for healing… not just in Bosco…
And with that, I find great humbleness and gratitude in the power of “prayer”… I was not “alone”, the “energy field” of lovingness and truth was all around, and I felt safe to be present in my space, in each moment, with him and each situation the rest of the day.
Thank you friends for “holding space” for us today… know I will always intend to do the same for you.