Happy Father’s Day…sort of

by Bryan Moss

Collective society’s influence on family has always had the male be the protector, provider, and the decision maker of ‘his’ tribe. Throughout the ages fathers have always been considered the bread winners of the family.   The mothers of those families were always looked upon as the gatherers and their femininity provided the love that held the family together. It’s always been expected of the wife to follow the husband’s lead and keep the children in order. It’s up to the father to get what the family needs. Masculinity has always been considered a more dominant force over femininity. Therefore, force equals masculinity. Men are strong and women are weaker than men. This conditioning has been ingrained in our heads throughout history. I was certainly brainwashed and conditioned to think that way. However, as I grew into adulthood, these traditional views didn’t make sense, but I just couldn’t put my finger on ‘why’ they didn’t make sense to me. Until I was schooled in energy work. Education has changed. Technology certainly has changed. I think the majority’s concepts of what Fathers Day and Mothers Day are about is in need of a change.
   From an energy workers perspective, our bodies contain the two energy frequencies of the feminine and masculine, God given gifts from the Divine spirit. The two give birth to the Divine Child creating form to family. This is where the truth ends and the conditioned lies begin. The collective takes this literally and keeps it all separate. Thus we assign specific qualities to the mother, father, and child. We externalize these qualities and attributes without realizing we’re giving away our inherited divine powers and virtues. Energetically, Feminine and Masculine attributes aren’t divided and ‘assigned’ to specific genders. On the contrary, BOTH Feminine and Masculine energies are within the human body, which us Energetic Beings live in. Man or woman, it’s our responsibility to seek the union of the energies WITHIN us first. In my humble opinion, this is one of the main reasons why most people are wrapped up in their major conflicts. They don’t take time to care for, or even acknowledge, the feminine and masculine sides within. Historical views are out of balance, as far as the two energies are concerned. Men and women need to learn how to reconnect with both before continuing on their life’s journey.
 It’s important for the male to see that power doesn’t mean force. Media, social venues and society in general promote and encourage this way of thinking. Real power doesn’t come from dominating and controlling anything or anyone. Real power is the recognition of the necessity of these two energies merging as one and only then acting from the feelings of our heart. Every man needs to understand the feminine aspects of himself. When a man begins merging his masculine energy with the feminine energy, that’s been dormant for years, he develops compassion for others. He begins to experience truth in action first hand. He finds himself not judging others as much, for when he really looks at things, he’s done those same things himself in one way or the other. Self-responsibility takes the place of accusations and externalizations. Reflecting, learning and reframing his mistakes and misperceptions takes the place of victimhood and pride. He learns his very inaccurate mind/ego is always going to be there and real wisdom is gained from feeling with his Heart.
 Naturally, the woman needs to nurture her masculine side as much as the male needs to nurture his feminine side. And when all is said and done, maintaining a balance with the two energies becomes the foundation for true growth from within……your Heart.
  Energy is constantly changing. Our journeys are constantly changing. It seems to me the perception of Fathers Day needs to change too. Nevertheless, regardless of your views on this topic, if you’re a Dad to any extent: children, pets, plants….allow me to wish you a Happy Fathers Day!!
..Bryan

Depression and Suicide

by Shiela Reed

Sadly there is much talk the last few weeks about depression and suicide.  Take heed and make sure you are taking good care of yourself and being aware of what is around you.  Your choice in people and environment can also effect you.  Remember to be kind and reach out to someone that could use a hello.

It’s probably not as likely as you might think that you would for sure know when someone is contemplating suicide.

It’s a darkened state that never really seems to lift, or at least not for long. A person probably gets good at “fitting in” and “putting on a happy face”.   It starts to feel like that’s the only way it will ever be.

Maybe one day the darkness doesn’t feel like it will ever lift again, or maybe it becomes too hard to put on the show any longer.

It’s probably impossible to ever really know “why” or “what was the final straw”, if there is even such a thing.

I can only tell you from my own experience, that after struggles with depression and having continued to seek out ways to “feel better”, I can now put things together that work for me.

Today, most times are a moment by moment assessment of what my mood is and after having learned about energetic awarenss, I can now actually find relief in knowing it has helped me change enough to not get “caught up in an emotional roller coaster ride” like I used to.

Instead, now I feel like I can honestly CHOOSE and I can “let go” without as much guilt or self judgement.

Don’t get me wrong, it sure the hell doesn’t mean I don’t have feelings, down days, sour moods, or anything else that can come out of the blue. But what doesn’t happen as often is that I don’t feel “trapped there” forever.
It’s hard… it’s not easy when all you want is to talk to someone, a hug, a friend, to feel important, someone to pay attention to you, but you end up sad and looking at “everyone else” and comparing what you “think” others have… when in reality, we all struggle. It’s just that most hide it well or have learned to not linger there as long anymore.  In reality, we ALL need connections.

Sadly we often don’t know how to ask or share experiences genuinely with others because we’ve been wounded. While in the end, the truth is that we have the hardest time truly loving and accepting ourselves first… so we silently struggle.

So to family and friends and survivors, there may have never been anything you could actually have “prevented”, instead the biggest challenge may really be within ALL of us… as every single one of us can learn to be kinder to ourselves, show grace and mercy to ourselves and others, with a genuine human compassion for the life struggles that are unseen in us all.

Again, reach out, be kind, make a positive difference.

May there be peace in your mind, love in your heart, and blessings that come from your tongue.

Shiela

Here is a good resource for anyone that needs help for themselves or a friend or loved one.

Declutter

Decluttering

By Shiela Reed

The energies have been coming on strong for over a month now and may feel pretty intense to just throw everything away and start over. Yet there is also a bit of a nagging to “hang on” to everything “just in case”!

That can actually be rather anxiety provoking. I have felt it and have had to remind myself daily to check in with my inner self and allow myself to take a little time to determine if I am functioning on fear or everyone else’s energy rather than my own true prompts.

I’m not gonna lie, it’s hard sometimes!!! It can feel like all or nothing at once. We run or freeze or get angry for no reason due to the underlying “frustration” that we probably don’t recognize.

So far the best things I’m doing are literally stopping what I’m doing and sit still for a few minutes (or more) and breath, relax a little (preferably outside or at least somewhere quiet and non distracting or cluttered with stuff or “feelings”).

Then when I ask myself “do I want to really do this now?” – (funny because I literally just had a wasp land on me out of the blue and get my attention to look up her symbolism as a new totem animal/messenger and it’s very much about new beginnings, focusing on what I want and is important to me as well as becoming more clear on the expressions of myself as I shift and change in the new process I’m going through) i.e. welcome to this website and blog! 🙂

Anyway, to continue 😉 – sometimes the answer might be, “no” never, no not right now, yes now, yes, but adjust a little… etc. Regardless, just listen… follow your prompting. Breath and release through the fear and anxiety. Close your eyes, the visions and views they see can be distracting. Take your time. You may even need to leave it be and come back to it later. Insert a healthy physical distraction maybe, like a walk, a nap, a scenic drive…

In the end, give yourself permission to follow your own guidance.

Also know that the “clearing out and de-cluttering pull” is more than about our physical space. There is often a deeper mental and emotional clearing that is needed. We just notice the physical first in most cases because that’s where most of us are used to functioning. Plus, let’s face face it, we can “control”, manipulate, and see results of physical “stuff” right?!… that gives us a sense of accomplishment and a form of temporary relief. Which is great and even necessary at the right times. It can actually set us up for having an improved personal space to work from and go deeper on that mental and emotional “stuff”…. but don’t forget to also pay attention to that underlying part… it’s probably trying to get your attention for a reason.   So, remember to “go back there and revisit it”.

I also know this is when it’s really nice to have someone to reflect with and personally I enjoy having my own energetic support system in place to get some support to go just a little deeper into my own inner connection.   There are many out there and starting up… so just make sure it resonates with your heart.

Well, it is time to continue with some more assessment of my environment and another layer of “de-cluttering” as I too move forward with opening up my space and energetic field a bit more.

I’m trying to remember that holding on to too many things (physical things, mental things, emotional things) not only effects my energetic space and physical body, it also limits me from being as open to the new and wonderful things trying to find their way into my life. ❤

Blessings and best regards during your journey.
Shiela

May monthly message – Food for Thought – What are You Feeding?

by Shiela Reed

As we move through spring heading quickly into summer here in the Midwest of the USA, the reminder and messages about being conscious of what we allow and thus “put” in our “bodies” has become very active.  But there is more…

Have you considered that your body is really more than just your “physicalness”?

I realize this can get pretty overwhelming kind of quickly and that everyone isn’t really as interested in “digging in” further – but in reality – it’s extremely important to gain at least a little deeper understanding  of how our systems work together.  It’s actually a major key to overall wellness/well-being.

So – just as a start, consider a few other aspects to your “body” – yes – think of a few physical things that go together (i.e. stomach, spleen, pancreas, liver)- Google it –it’s fun to get a little more educated on how your body works.

I’ve been using this myself as I have been checking in on a muscle/tendon/plantar faciiatis weakness and pain issue of my own, thus leading me to multiple other options in healing my own chronic problem, which I wouldn’t have considered before.

Now, let’s go a step further – how about your emotional & mental “mind”/perspective?  How is that?  These are kind of like “rooms in our house”.  Did you know/or have you realized the actual affect these have/can have on your physical body – your “house”?  Think about it, if you have cluttered rooms and spaces in your home – it usually doesn’t feel real good, right?  And if you struggle (like I do sometimes)  to “let things go” – and/or you actually are finding it to be “safer” with the clutter – it usually is a clue (at least for me) that I have something underneath that I’m not aware of or fully acknowledging.

So if we go a bit further- we will notice and become aware of the energetic part of our system – our “wiring” – plumbing, whatever you want to call it that runs behind what we traditionally are conditioned to “see”.

When you start to become aware of this aspect of your “house”/body – “space” – you live in – it can actually feel a bit confusing, overwhelming, and even scary because it’s not what we are used to and we don’t have a lot of practice with noticing it, talking about it, much less managing it – so – what can one do?

Here are a few simple awareness tips – and seriously – keep it simple – don’t “over think” (if you start to go there and it feels “stressful” – let it go by acknowledging “I’m not ready yet”.

This is where I’ve learned to have some fun and make it my own –

  • What’s around your physical space? Your “house”?

Find little places throughout your day to just be in touch with your surrounding and how you are feeling.  i.e. I’m sitting outside having coffee, listening to the birds, feeling the cool breeze while the sun is starting to warm my body – yet my mind is thinking of the 10 things I NEED/should be doing rather than writing – at first I feel a bit of anxiousness (I used to feel guilty) Now I acknowledge it – “let it go” and flow by me so I can write the message I’m guided/led to share today, rather than ignore the inner signals.

In the past (and still sometimes) – I would have followed the guilt and it would have affected the rest of my day – as my energetic system would have not been congruent with that inner prompting.  So my mood and emotion and mentalness would go another direction – guilt, anxiety, judgement, anger, fear.

  • What’s in your mind/emotion – your “rooms”?

Become aware of not only what you are physically putting in and on your physical body – but what you are allowing in your mind, your sight, and your ears – Is what you are looking at feeling good to your soul?  Is what you’re reading feeding your spirit?  Or what you are listening to (music AND words from others AND yourself) supporting a positive space within which to grow into a better version of yourself?  If not, then make some choices about changing these things.

  • How is your energy flow? Are there blocks in your inner wiring/plumping/system?

Honestly – by trying the other two things, you will naturally start to reconnect to an ability to feel this at a deeper level.  It’s why we get the advice to “just breathe” “go outside/be in nature” “be still”.  Seek peaceful locations and people – because that naturally helps us balance out a littler.  It’s energetic support in its simplest form.  But we can learn to do this on our own too – we just have to become “aware” of the process.

Finding little points of awareness everyday can make some very significant shifts in your over all day – and ultimately your well-being.

So –how is your personal “space”?

Are you making your personal body/”house” just a house? Or a long term “home”?  Are there clearer rooms and improved inner flow in your wiring?  It’s a good time of year to self-check and adjust some things.  J

Happy “eating”…

Shiela

BREATHE by Bryan Moss

 

 You get to your place of work. Parking your car you notice the time on your dashboard and you’re barely on time. You were hoping to come in early to prepare for a presentation to give at a quarter past the hour. So you feel a little rushed, but at least you are on time and not late. Just as you slam the car door shut…actually, it’s the in-between time from releasing the door to when it shuts…you realize you left your keys in the ignition. SLAM!  Your car keys are locked in your car but you don’t have time to deal with whom to call to come get your keys out. You have a meeting your speaking at in less than 15 minutes. You decide to deal with it after the presentation. On your way to your office you swing by the break room to pick up a cup of coffee. The wall clock shows you have 5 minutes to pick up whatever materials you need, from your office, before heading to the conference room. As your taking your first sip of java—-oops! A coworker bumps into you and your nice hot cup of coffee spills all over your blouse or shirt. Wiping the liquid off, you manage to get the materials from your office and head to the conference room. Visions of giving an important presentation with a coffee stain in full view embarrasses you. Then you have that familiar feeling————-your stressed out!
 Similar scenarios have happened to me. One thing after another, and another, and another just pile up. And when there’s a deadline involved..yikes! I know for me, neck and shoulders tense up, my adrenaline is flowing,  my heart’s racing, all of this while I feel perspiration under my arms and across my forehead. I get irritable but, because it’s a formal situation, can’t express the frustration and anger.
 Then victimhood moves into my brain’s neighborhood. “Why does this always happen to ME?” “It never fails. There’s always something that happens when I’m about to do something important.”
 I use to wonder ‘how can I manage this onslaught of life’s events’?
 Then I discovered…to BREATHE. No matter how rushed you are, it’s possible to take a quick ‘time out’ and inhale slowly, filling your lungs to capacity, then slowly exhale. Doing something so simple can help “reset” the moment. Putting your system on “pause” can slow down the momentum of life’s onslaught of events, helping to take the edge off.
 Remember to SLOWLY fill your tummy with air first and then continue on up your lungs, taking in as much as comfortably possible. Then release the air in reverse order. Slowly exhaling the air from the lungs and then out of the abdomen. Pause….repeat again. But this time, pause a moment or two between the inhale and exhale. If you must, do it again.
 Did you know when exhaling it’s mentally impossible to think a thought? That brain noise ceases to exist for a moment. Often it only takes that brief period for your whole system to regroup and reset your thoughts and feelings. In the above scenario, when picking up the materials in your office, right after the coffee spill and before heading off to the meeting, it would’ve been the right time to drop everything and spend 30 to 60 seconds resetting through slowly breathing. Consciously breathing, and slowly at that, brings me back into the “moment” without thoughts of past or future events. Instead of going into “Why me?” that simple act can help put things into proper perspective.
 In the conference room, instead of worrying how I would look to others with a big stain and wishing it would go away, perhaps I would address the ‘elephant in the room’ and refer to it. I’d point to it and comment, “I bumped into someone while having coffee. My shirt is more awake than I am so my shirt will be doing the presentation this morning.” Having to bring everyone’s attention to it WILLINGLY takes away the embarrassment and discomfort of having to talk with a noticeable stain, therefore, having everyone focus on your presentation instead of the stain. Not to mention the awkwardness is removed from your mind so you’re able to give them your full attention.
 The meeting is finished and all went well. After returning to the office, perhaps I would take a couple more of conscious, slow breaths and ‘exhale’ the residue of the meeting out of my system. Then call AAA or a locksmith to arrange a time to fetch my keys out of my locked car. Doing this simple technique of breathing will also prevent me from taking out these mishaps out on another coworker or, more importantly, holding it all in for the rest of the work day only to take it out on a loved one when I get home.
 The kids are running around playing and screaming, the dog’s barking, the T.V. is on too loud?….BREATHE.
Standing and waiting forever in line at the market?……BREATHE.
Stuck in traffic?…….BREATHE.
It’s simple, takes a moment of your time, and effective. Try it. BREATHE. It’s a beautiful thing.
with love and respect,
bryan

April Monthly Message – Letting Go vs Holding On

Letting go or Holding on…

by Shiela Reed

This message has been coming in for a week or so and ironically kept being vague about how to write about it… So I hope this information lands in “just the right spot” for you to get what you need.

The topic is a tricky one – since it has a classic connection to ego, which adds to the layers of “stuff” to work through.  After all, the ego prefers to have a say so in this stuff right?!

SO, how deep does the concept of “letting go vs holding on” really go?  Honestly, as deep as we each can take it…

In reality every decision has an element of both.  As we gain knowledge from a learning experience, we “hold on” to that, even if we “let go” of some parts of that experience.  We also find that emotions, feelings, behaviors, habits, people, things, and all other parts of our being and lives, eventually tend to come to some place of needing our attention regarding this exact topic….

Therefore, do we hold on to that or let it go?

Over time I have found that HOW we do this makes a great deal of difference and surprisingly (or maybe not) each one of the situations may just require a little bit of a different approach.  So no wonder it feels daunting and like something we end up “avoiding”!  Even if we deep down know that NOT making a decision, is actually STILL a decision…  right?

Here’s an example.  Lately I have been thinking a lot about things, people, feelings, behaviors, etc.  that I really need to put through this course of thinking.  Maybe it’s the natural element of newness, clearing, cleansing and so on associated with the Spring season (here in the Midwest of the USA at least)…  yet, I continue to just “think about it”.

Regardless, WHEN the time “hit’s you” and there is an inner prompting to take heed of this process regarding something in your life, do your due diligence and check in with your true self/“inner you”/heart space for true guidance before jumping in.

How many times have you made decisions hot from an emotion?  We say something without thinking, we spontaneously quit on something out of anger, or we hold on to items for years and don’t even know why….   Without that “north star” point of reference for ourselves, we are basically left at the mercy/whim of our ego, emotions, and any other random mechanism we grasp for in a moment of panic or desperation.

But it doesn’t have to be that way.  We really can take a moment or more to really “feel into” what it’s about and find our inner voice which can give us an idea or at least an understanding that is deeper and more meaningful, and ultimately provide us some much needed guidance for making a decision that deep down we really can live with.

So, as you “spring clean” your physical, emotional, and/or mental space, take 5 slow deep breaths, blow each one out as if you were blowing out birthday candles, and THEN ask yourself, do I “want” this?, do I “need” this and if so WHY and for what purpose?  Do the answers fit with your true heart direction or goals?  (be clear on a “want” and “need” as defined by YOU)

Spending some time assessing this part really can make a difference in not only our feelings and satisfaction in knowing we have followed our “heart”, but ultimately in our ability to “move on” or “stick around” with people, feelings, emotions, tasks, behaviors, etc.

For me, I have discovered I have a lot harder time letting go of things than I realized.  From clearing my phone of pictures (which I had already backed up in 5 other placed mind you) to cleaning out my closet to making a much needed change in my work life…. It’s been a process of going just a little deeper each time I would think about the topic and eventually I found my way to the root reason I was still “holding on” – that was when I found the freedom to make a choice… I then knew WHY I was holding on and then I and only ME could decide if I wanted to continue with that or not.

Yes it takes time, work, diligence, and consistency for it to become “second nature” but since we are all a “work in progress” anyway, why not dig into the deeper reason behind why we “hold on” vs “let go”?  After all – each effort is one step closer to a true heart connection and increased inner peace.

Sending you peace in the process

Shiela

Anger, Anxiety, and Depression

by Shiela Reed

Although all of these are common emotions in all of us – for some of us (or even all of us at some point) one or all of them seem to just “get the best of us” and we struggle.

The time and energy we spend “recovering” from a bout of any one of them can feel exhausting. And that is usually where the “tables get turned” if you will – when we fight them, hate them, don’t want them, ignore them, or any other mechanism, besides finding that true inner place of acceptance and allowance – we will struggle.

Some of the mechanisms are very obvious- the angry at the world person; angry at everything and everyone. Some are more subtle – the person who ignores and pretends it’s never there, or gets so good at “stuffing it”, they end up disliking themselves for having any of these feelings.

Regardless of where we land on this, one of the key things seems to first be to be able to become aware of what is going on within our own energy system when these are present. That takes time and practice, but it will do one thing pretty quickly, which is important – it will take a bit of the “being controlled by” that thought/emotion out of that particular energy field and gives you even just a second to recognize an opportunity to shift it differently,.. IF YOU want to.  (Be honest with yourself here, sometimes we do just want to finish the moment of anger, sadness, or anxiousness and that is necessary and absolutely OK – just remain AWARE that YOU are choosing it, not that it is controlling you.)

The next hardest part is practicing remaining in this awareness – it’s like learning to ride a bike or even walk – you WILL fall down, it will not be smooth or “perfect”- hell!- some days it will seem impossible! But you try again each time and eventually it gets clearer as you become more connected to your “inner you”and THAT, feels better.

SO when I found myself stuck for long periods of time in those places- it was dark, scary, and lonely, because I simply didn’t know a clear way out or that in reality I was “feeding” that energy with my fear and lack of understanding at a deeper awareness, that the Ego mind was trying to “control” and “protect me”, the only way it knows how. Once I was able to recognize it – and shift a little, it felt better, for even a moment – yet truly, again, the hardest part continues to be not being discouraged or “beat myself up” when that “shift” didn’t/doesn’t, “last long enough”.

I have eventually found myself in a “true” enough space with my “inner me”, that I began asking “what does that even mean?… long enough?”. . I have been and continue to be immediately reminded that this “time frame” is not and does not mean what our mental/ego minds tell us.

What comes to mind for you? Long enough – “good” -seems as if we would want that forever right?   Long enough -“bad”- seems like we would want that shortened right?
But what if in the small moment you become aware and you try a slight shift in perspective – it changes the whole energetic dynamic ever so slightly and you realize – THAT is what is within you?!

Today I listen to and watch the rain – my sluggish energy started yesterday and instead of going with the feeling of everyone else “Oh yuck it’s raining, it’s grey, its dreary”, I have been able to choose to self nurture, slow down, appreciate the life that the rain is bringing and instead of grey and dreary I have been able to humbly appreciate and SEE the jumping colors of Spring – green grass forming, Easter lilies and Spring flowers popping, forsythia budding and the early sprouts on the trees.
I realize full heartedly that it is much more than just “a will to change” our perspective, but I do know it just takes the one baby step or a few turns of the peddles on that bike for the first time – to realize “I can do it” and “it’s OK to fall”, I only need to try again and love myself fully and deeply enough to know I’m worth the effort.
Just as you are too.
Peace, Love and Blessings

Shiela

March Monthly Message – Self-Acceptance

by Shiela Reed

As I’ve meditated on the message of self-acceptance a few things kept coming in.

One – it’s definition may not be exactly what one may think.

Two – it takes a deeper level of connection to understand and be aware enough to continue this inner journey.

The “definition” as given to me through inner promptings is more about a deep self-love that holds zero forms of judgement.  It is not good, it is not bad, it is not of ego.  It is a most pure essence of acceptance and comes from our deepest heart space and connection with our divine spark of life.

An example of how easily it can become confusing or miss guided kept coming up.  Although there is importance in taking care of oneself and at times, in being “proud” of things we do and “of ourselves”, it is not about being at the expense of others or one sided thinking.  Being prideful in that sort of way is actually a product of the ego.  One way I “check myself” regarding this is by first – being able to be aware that something may not be setting just right – I may have a twinge of “hmm that feels at odds” (even when I don’t want to see it!).    That’s when I ask questions of myself such as “where is that coming from?”, is that connected to an unmet emotional need maybe?

Anymore, I have also been able to start telling rather quickly if I get a “defensiveness” that rises up, such as “I am so proud of this or that part of me that I must tell everyone about it (I check if I’m being boastful and maybe really feeling loss or “less than” in some way as the real motivator for my announcements) and there is also a clue that if I feel as if they “do not see how good I am” I feel hurt or angry (I check for other missing needs, such as attention, love, etc that I may actually be seeking from outside myself).

As an alternative, if there is a level of true heart self-acceptance, there will not be a “need” associated with it.  It will “just be”.  It is not about the recognition or notation.  Instead it is the feeling of deep self-love, knowing you are living a true connection in that moment.  The topic or event or activity and any outcomes or lack thereof,  “just is”.

As far as the second part – I noticed as I have been contemplating this, it became clear that there is a whole lot more to it under the surface and it is NOT that easy!  I have returned to my meditation on it a few times the last few weeks to try and figure out how to even begin to say anything about it and NOT inadvertently include my own ego/bias/definitions.  🙂  I was again reminded how it is simply not a matter of shear “will” or overpowering that can be done by the mind, emotion, or a “stronger desire”.

I simply cannot WILL MYSELF to love me better or myself more.  No amount of affirmations or books or surface work will get you all the way there.  It takes the deeper, inner workings to finally shift that part of our inner consciousness and that quite frankly is very different for each of us!  There is no “one size fits all”, there is no “one book you will read” that will snap everyone into this space, there is no “one practice/program” that is guaranteed to work for every single person.

That’s probably clear as we think of the many motivational speakers, self-help books, courses, therapies, etc. that seem to work for some but not for someone else…

We will each come to this place on our own and at our own divine timing.  Maybe some never will… that is part of a greater mystery for another day…  🙂

In actuality, it is one of the most significant steps in our personal life journey that we can and will ever take.  Because technically without it, we seem to always feel as if we are still just a little short from “really getting it”.  Maybe this is why we keep searching and looking?  Like we know there is a key link that is a core connector for all the parts of our journey….

Having this inner connection, no matter how small it starts, is where the transformation begins.  It’s like a small light in a dark tunnel that as we notice it and move toward it, it becomes brighter and truer.  You gain the reference feelings of “just knowing your truth” and you find peace and comfort there, even if no one else does.  Yes it may be difficult, but it’s at this point that we realize there is no need to force our own thoughts and feelings, or brag or boast, because we have our own deep inner true heart level of self-acceptance that cannot be taken away from us.

The most difficult thing for me to remember at this point, is to love myself through the times of doubt and setbacks, and remember I will always be learning.  Because this is not a level of life easily lived every minute of every day – yet is it worthy of the effort to try.

May you start with new awareness as you take one step at a time toward a deeper level of true heart self-acceptance.

Blessings

Shiela

Sharing a milestone of healing

by Shiela Reed
This started as “just another day” for me as I got up and was doing what I do on Saturday mornings. I’m sure it would have crossed my mind or popped up somewhere today, but my “non drinking life” has become my norm and a super special and important person reminded me just how special it is to remember. ?
 
12 years ago today I became a “non drinker”. I’m not going to go into all that reflection but I do need to make sure it’s clear to myself that I am Alive, Blessed, and Grateful.
 
I truly try to live that, just as much as probably anyone else out there “just trying to do a little better each day”, but it’s days like today and special people who remind you, just how blessed one really is.
 
My heart is raised with love ? to ALL those who continue to struggle with all types of addictions. My story is not one of “devastation and destruction” as most people think about regarding this subject.
Many many people who know me have wondered “why” and that it “never seemed that bad”. But in reality, there was plenty of “collateral damage” and my inner self had taken a hit for so long I never realized how separated I had become from the true ME.
 
So as I shed tears of joy and happiness today and thankfulness for the life I’ve graciously been given. I clearly know that it could not be what it is today without those first steps to walk toward change. ?
 
Yes it was hard. Yes it was scary. No I didn’t “want” to do it. But the special spark and divine connection to my creator which has always lived within, kept whispering and telling me I had to or my life here was never going to get better.
 
Everyone’s “first steps” are different, mine happened to be counseling, lots of self reflection, a desire for change, and then thankfully AA, which taught me exactly the base I needed. I never want to forget or take that for granted.
 
I am especially thankful for the many “reminders” I am given on a daily basis which keeps me humbled , grateful, and deeply blessed.
 
Have a great day and find something good to be openly thankful for today. ? ??
Blessings
Shiela

THE ART OF CRYING by Bryan Moss

As an energy worker I found myself wondering, for the past number of weeks, if I was still in touch with my Heart. Things that would normally move me to tears just weren’t doing it anymore. Mentioning of my mother’ name (she made her transition back in 1995 due to cancer), observing a stray dog or cat wandering the streets, or seeing an elderly person in a room full of younger people and not one person talking to them, all would wet my eyes. But lately, not anymore.
 My critical inner voice would heckle me with: “I’ve become cold hearted.” “I don’t seem to care about anything anymore.” “I’ve lost touch with my soul.” Within collective society the majority of people are conditioned to believe crying is a form of weakness. Now it’s acceptable if you initially cry over unexpected bad news, but don’t let that crying linger on. “Real men don’t cry, they just handle it” (whatever ‘it’ is). It’s crammed down everyone’s throats to “be strong and tough”. “Don’t let people know you’re weak.” “Don’t show people you’re vulnerable.” All programmed collective B.S.!!!…… mmmmmmm……
 A little research shows there are substantial benefits in the art of crying. The tears we shed have chemicals  that actually make us feel good! Oxytocin and endorphins are released to help relieve pain and elevate our moods. Tears help to kill bacteria and keep the eyes clean with a fluid called lysozyme. Crying activates the parasympathetic nervous system (PNS), which helps us to relax. Little did I know of the physical benefits of crying, other than it usually feels good to get that ‘stuff’ out afterwords.
 Now, what’s got me writing about crying? A series of recent personal events all manifested within a 3 week period. One right after another, culminating with one of my best friends dying in a car accident, first thing in the morning on Valentine’s Day. As I was leaving my work place for lunch, a mutual friend called  to let me know. After disbelief passed through me, I cried and cried and cried in the cab of my truck for the hour, not even touching my lunch. Memories flooding my brain with all of the times we spent together. How we met each other. How we hit it off immediately through the same sense of humor and observations. The mutual respect and admiration we had for one another. After lunch, I went back into work sobbing. For the next couple of days I alternated between crying and sobbing. Reflecting, I was also aware I wasn’t only crying because I lost a best friend. I was releasing stress built up over all of the unexpected events that slammed me from the last weeks.
 What was cool was I had made the transition from feeling guilty and self conscious for crying to knowing it was my God given right to cry…and I was proud of it! I looked at the ‘gifts’ my pal gave to me. His humor, understanding, and most of all, his humbleness. He was a very knowledgeable man who knew a little of just about anything and yet very humble. I guess you could say he taught me, by example, the virtues of humbleness.  My friend’s passing couldn’t have happened on a more appropriate day, Valentine’s Day, for he had a BIG Heart!
  I realized I had to ‘let him go’. I also realized dwelling on and on about the ‘news’ of his passing wasn’t fair to him as well. The stray animals, my mom’s passing, the elders being neglected…gradually I had to let them all go and not ‘hang on’ to them. Energetically it could be stagnating if I didn’t, for all concerned.
 Acceptance gradually entered my life over the past number of months. Accepting that “everything’s perfect the way it is”. And in  accepting life as it unfolds I come from the power of choice. Do I choose to engage in conversation with the lady in the wheelchair? Do I feed the stray cat at work?  I wasn’t becoming cold hearted or insensitive. Instead it’s the opposite. I was becoming more accepting and compassionate without judgement as life’s events unfolded. I never did lose touch with my Heart. Out of acceptance I  was nurturing it.
 All of these realizations wouldn’t have come to me if I didn’t participate in the art of crying. Pass me a tissue please.
 With Respect and Love,
 Bryan